I see the whole moon 

As a parent, it is easy to see all the wonderful qualities our children possess. I suppose it is because we see our children through the lens of love. I wonder what would happen If we afforded ourselves that same compassion? How would that change how we see ourselves?

This summer, I turned my garage into a workshop and spent my days restoring furniture. I enjoy working with pieces that most categorize as junk. But I have a gift; I see the beauty, the lines, the curves. So, I stripped and sanded, and I discovered great pieces. One of my favorites is a church pew that I bought for $50. It is was kept outdoors and in bad shape. I remember the look from my husband, the question, so we are buying junk now? I replied, it is only $50 plus beauty is in the beholder’s eye. At which he responded, well, sounds like $50 too much. Despite my hubby’s snarky comments, our pew serves as a constant reminder that beauty exists in everything. Our pew is the main character in our dining room with perfect imperfections; she is gorgeous. The truth is that she was there the whole time; she just needed a few layers stripped.

I am brave, I am bruised
I am who I'm meant to be, this is me
Look out 'cause here I come
And I'm marching on to the beat I drum
I'm not scared to be seen
I make not apologies, this is me
~Keala Settle (The Greatest Showman)

I know it is hard. I struggled myself. I spent a better part of my life not seeing the whole of me and feeling insecure. I was not kind to my body; I punished it with crazy diets, a cat and mouse game, oh you can eat today, nope, not today, no carbs, no dairy, lots of no’s. It took me a minute to realize my weight was simply a symptom of a much bigger problem. The real issue was low self-esteem and depression that was brought on by a messy childhood. Once I connected these dots, it completely changed my relationship with food and how I view my body. I spent years hating my legs (I am so sorry, legs), but now I see strong legs that carried me through two pregnancies. I thank them daily for these legs, have completed not one but two marathons and a 3-day cancer walk. These legs are fast enough to run-down balls at tennis matches. I appreciate my legs now, and I am kind to them. I do not punish them by withholding. Instead, I reward them with movement- with peloton rides, dancing, exploring new cities, and long hikes.

I am curious, what do you see when you look in the mirror? Are you able to see past the protective layers, the mask, and see the whole of you? Do you see how incredible you are? Or are you focused on every wrinkle, every imperfection? Is someone dimming your light, or are you doing it all by yourself?

Still cannot see- I GOTcha

My wish is that you get to a place where you see the whole of you. But in case you are having difficulties, I’ll be here to nudge you, to remind you that you are perfectly made. I can appreciate the power of holding the mirror up and illuminating the path for others. Many have held the mirror for me. Think about the moments when you have had self-doubt, and your partner tells you how beautiful you are. Or your bestie cheers loudly as you work towards making your dreams a reality. Or a mentor encourages you to start the business, write the book, and take the leap. Sometimes we all need a little nudge.

This makes me think of my blue-eyed bonus sister. She is gorgeous. She is thoughtful, kind, real, and sprinkles the right amount of fun. Blue eyes give the best hugs; you will either find yourself devouring her baked goods (sugar cookies, banana cake, Rice Krispy treats) or have a tasty in your hands (crown and 7) …it is just how she rolls. You never leave her kitchen sober or hungry. No matter what, she makes one feel appreciated and loved. This is part of her DNA; she is an illuminator, not the flashy kind, not the look at me, look at all I do- she flies under the radar, often goes unnoticed, but her wings expand and cover a lot of ground. Her superpower really shines through when she is around older adults. Her tone softens, her eyes sparkle even brighter, she is tender and compassionate and makes old souls feel vital and relevant. It is fantastic to witness. She has held the mirror up for me on many occasions, and sometimes I must hold the mirror for her- to remind her that she is fabulous.

Across town, another beauty needs an occasional nudge- If you met this gal- I know you would see what I see- a devoted mama, wife, daughter, sister. She is young, beautiful, and talented. Her smile and energy are contagious – she is sunshine in a bottle-but sometimes she needs a nudge- head up buttercup- change the chatter in your head – if she saw what I see, she would never have an ounce of self-doubt. I know she will eventually get to a place where she sees; in the meantime, I will be her get‘ in my’ ToGETher.’

So that is how I am flying these days, holding a mirror and calling out superpowers. If I see it or feel it, you are getting a shout out. You are talented, you have gorgeous eyes, I love the way you make people feel, you have a beautiful smile, you are a rock star, your laugh is infectious, you got this!

I am nudging, will you join me?

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